IT'S NOT OVER UNTIL WE SAY IT'S OVER

April 3, 2002

So after I got home from the Safe last night I promptly burst into tears again and embarassingly enough, I couldn't even get to sleep I was crying so hard and so I came straggling in a little late (okay, like six hours late) and on my way in while I was stuck in traffic, I get a call on my cell phone from Marjorie who has scored me tickets to this evening's game, like HERE I GO ALL 3-for-3 so far this season and I get my friend Jennifer to go and they're giving away cool calendars and then we find our seats which were pretty sweet and I'm super tired but it's so worth it and then the game is quickly underway and Paul Abbott begins what would be a very rough evening for him bless his heart and I am getting all stressed out because he walks Kenny Lofton and then stupid Kenny steals second and then stupid Kenny steals third, like SOMEBODY TRIP HIM FOR GOD'S SAKE and with a ground out, it is quickly 1-0 CWS and then Abby recovered nicely to K The Big Squirt and Magglio Alfredo I mean Frank Thomas and Magglio Ordonez.

So our turn and we are rather dismally down in order and the people who had sat behind Kevin and I the night before must've sent their relatives to this game because I SWEAR TO GOD these two nudniks sat down behind us and started talking VERY LOUDLY nonstop about organized religion and why they hated living in L.A. and why they hate Joan Rivers like there's anybody who doesn't and all about these stupid books nobody's ever heard of and it's like "THIS IS A BASEBALL GAME! SHUT UP AND PAY ATTENTION!" So anyway, second inning and Abby sits them down all 1-2-3 like and then Edgar led off with a walk and then John Olerud singled and then Mike Cameron singled to load the bases and I plug my ears because I don't want to hear about Joan Rivers anymore and then Dan Wilson hit a sac fly to score Gar and we are all tied and John even went to third on it and then Cammie went to second on a wild pitch from Wright and then Carlos ripped a big nasty double to score them both and we take the lead 3-1 and head off to the third inning.

Okay, this was exceedingly stressful and I'm not sure I can relive it but I'll try: Mark Johnson leads off with a single. An out later and stupid Kenny Lofton freaking walked again. A strikeout after that and... Frank Thomas singled which scored that Johnson guy and then in one of the most horrifying events ever to unfold, Abby throws a wild pitch and stupid Kenny Lofton manages to score on it, like somebody SPIKE HIM IN THE BUTT AND KNOCK HIM DOWN ALREADY and as if I weren't already pissed off enough, the guy behind us who had been yammering away to his lady friend this whole time goes "How did that happen? I wasn't even watching!" and it took every ounce of willpower I possessed to not turn around and poke out both his eyes.

So we finally get out of it and we are all tied at 3 and we are down in order which really sucked a great deal, so fourth inning and Abbott's still in there and Paul Konerko singled and Jose Valentin grounded him over to left and I tell Jen that I hate the people sitting behind us which she already knew but then Carlos Lee walked and Abby is still in there and then Johnson singled and Abby is still in there and Konerko tried to score but Cammie was having NONE OF THAT as he totally gunned his butt down at home and I was all proud of him but then ANOTHER wild pitch later and Abby is still in there and Royce Clayton, who had JUST MISSED a couple of homeruns earlier this game and who I swear to God I was just thinking to myself "Abby better watch it with him, Clayton's going to knock one out tonight if he's not careful" promptly KNOCKED ONE OUT for a 3 run shot and I was forced to drop the F-Bomb and Abby is still in there and he K'd Lofton which was very good since I probably would've had a complete and total breakdown if he let him on base again.

So our turn and we are down 1-2-3 and the stupid people behind us finally left and hopefully realized they had no business taking up good seats at a baseball game just to talk about Joan Rivers only they forgot to take Cell Phone Guy seated behind and to the left of me with them so I took his cell phone and chucked it down the stands as far as I could and no wait that was just wishful thinking on my part and it's still 6-3 Chicago going into the fifth inning and Joel Pineiro relieved Abby and with 1 out, The Big Squirt walked but then Kevin's best friend Magglio Ordonez grounded into a double play and how much do I love Magglio Ordonez and Joel.

"Ironically, Pineiro knocked himself out of the rotation by pitching too well in a relief effort on Opening Day. He threw two scoreless innings with three strikeouts, piquing Piniella's curiosity and ending, at least for now, his career as a starter." -David Andriesen, sportswriter

"I said it from the first day of spring training. I just want to pitch." -Joel Pineiro

So then Dan led off with a single and Carlos lined a shot off the pitcher's glove and Dan looked totally safe at second but they called him out, and then a few seconds later the booing got even louder because they'd shown the replay where he STILL LOOKED SAFE like way to go ump and then Ichiro hit into a fielder's choice and Carlos was out but Ichi stole second and Mac walked and then... and then something.... something terrible happened and somebody missed a sign I guess, because I think there was supposed to be a double steal going on only somebody held up when they shouldn't have and just like that we're done with the fifth.

So sixth inning and I actually liked the people sitting around us now that Stupid Cellphone Twerp had left and Joel retires the side in order which was rather excellent and then we are unfortunately down in order as well although Edgar gave the ball a pretty good ride to rightfield, so let us just move along to the seventh and John Halama relieved Joel and pitched very nicely to retire the side in order and then it's our turn again and Mike Cameron led off with a walk and then that guy Osuna relieved Wright and a double play later and Dan singled and then Carlos singled and then... oh nevermind.

Eighth inning and Halama yielded a harmless 2 out walk and then we're down in order again which sucked but then ninth inning and Ryan Franklin relieved Halama and retired the side in order, so our turn and pay attention because this just flat out rocked: Keith Foulke relieved Osuna and Ole led off with a single and then an out later and Jeff Cirillo finally found that elusive first hit of the season and singled himself, so with two on, Ruben Sierra pinch hit for Dan and reached on an infield single to load the bases and the crowd is starting to get really loud and then Ugueto came in to run for Ruben and Carlos Guillen bless him ripped a big old single which scored Ole and Jeff and put Ugueto at third and Ichiro singled which tied the game!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 6-all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And of course the crowd is going nuts and I'm beside myself and then Mac grounded the runners over and then Bret Boone just knocked a big old single to bring Carlos home and Bret is all pumping his fist and we WIN it, 7-6 and my oh my but that was pretty damn sweet right there and I am all hi-fiving the drunk guy we made friends with and he's all beside himself and I'm all beside myself and even Jennifer who is pretty quiet for the most part was a little beside herself and all the guys are running out on the field to celebrate and you just gotta love these guys.

The boys show love to the Boone after his game winning single.
photo: AP/ElaineThompson

"I played here the night they opened this place in '99, and it was really loud. Then last year we came in here and they swept us, just blew us out, and it was just as loud. I thought about that first thing after the trade, the fan support here. It's nice to be on this side of it." -Ben Davis