I Really, Really HATE the New York Yankees

I Really, Really HATE the New York Yankees

May 19, 2001

Okay, this probably isn't going to be one of my better reviews because I am still so bloody irritated over this loss I could scream.

And FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, ENOUGH WITH THAT BRITNEY SPEARS COMMERCIAL!

We get a pitching duel going, and Jamie Moyer, our "earnest little lefthander" who just happens to be one of my favorite Mariners besides, is pitching his heart out. He would go on to pitch 7 shut out innings and face only 22 batters, all to come away with no decision.

So anyway, first inning, and the Yankees are down in order, only the shallow fly ball that Paul O'Neil (who is booed soundly at his every at-bat, much to my amusement) hits made for a scary out when Carlos Guillen managed to kick Al Martin in the head, and the ball actually landed in Al's glove, and he managed to hold on to it despite being knocked unconscious, and if he wasn't completely unconscious, he was darn close and Stan Javier runs over to get the ball out of his glove by rolling him over and throwing it in just in case they didn't rule it an out since it was so chaotic and hard to see what really happened. Carlos is also down, and is holding his knee. I, meanwhile, am having a small breakdown that they're seriously injured. Carlos comes in on his own accord and Al is helped off the field. Anyway, we sit down in order too.

Turns out Carlos is fine, Al is going to get some time off having suffered a minor concussion, and the whole thing reminded me of when Alex Rodriguez slid high into Alex Cora last year and was knocked unconscious for what seemed like an eternity and I was SO WORRIED FOR HIM, as was the entire city of Seattle that he promptly turned his back on, I mean I'm not kidding, I thought he had broken his neck and I actually started CRYING because I'm such a dork and anyway, second and third innings... everybody's down in order. Fourth inning. Jamie gives up his one and only hit, which proved harmless. Then, with one out, Mark McLemore singled. He stole second and got to third on a throwing error by Jorge Pasada. Edgar Martinez singles to score him! We leave it leading 1-0.

Fifth and sixth, both sides repeat that 3 up, 3 down thing, and then in the seventh, the Yankees do it again, but we waste 2 singles and a walk to leave the bases loaded. I experience a deep sense of foreboding, I am not kidding. I even said outloud, "I hope that doesn't come back to haunt us", you can ask my cat.

Eighth. Arthur Lee Rhodes relieves Jamie, and the first guy he faces is Tino Martinez and the announcers were all, "Tino is geared for the fastball!" and I was all "Tino is geared for the bench, because that's where he's headed" and sure enough, he grounds out and I was immensely pleased with myself for calling that and then Artie gets my nemesis David Justice to strike out and then goes after Jorge Pasada for ANOTHER strike out to record a shut out inning of his own. Then, in our half, with Ichiro up for one last chance to extend his hitting streak... they HIT HIM WITH A PITCH and it is probably a good thing that I wasn't at that game because I likely would've charged the mound myself as mad as that made me, and I am still cursing that pitcher out when we move on to the ninth.

This... I can't talk about it, it's too horrifying and it's just SO WRONG. Kazu just didn't have it this afternoon and the [expletive deleted] Yankees manage to tie it, ruining Jamie's shot at a win and making me swear until I'm lightheaded from the effort. I am just sick over this and how much do I hate Derek Jeter and his stupid team and his STUPID RBI, I mean LAY DOWN AND DIE ALREADY! Yes, I am a poor sport. You have four World Series titles in the last five years to console yourselves with, so I'm not even going to feel bad about it. Plus, you know as well as I do that hating a franchise to such a degree is sadly a backhanded compliment due to the fact that said team is just that good. And so anyway, we waste a double in our half, and then we let those [expletives deleted] score in the tenth, and they WIN it, 2-1. So, needless to say, my heart is completely broken for the M's and I am terribly depressed for poor Kazu and just like yesterday, I'd add some quotes, but the first one I find starts off all gloom and doom which actually WORSENED my mood, which I didn't even think was possible, but it's like they were just WAITING for the Mariners to lose a couple of games like this and they're trying to reason that the Yankees took away some of our swagger or whatever and THEY MOST CERTAINLY DID NOT, we LOST A COUPLE OF GAMES WHICH IS BOUND TO HAPPEN OVER THE COURSE OF 162 OF THEM, and while this one was indeed heartbreaking and yesterday outright sucked, it's not as if we were ever OUT of either one of them, our pitching just hit a couple of bumps, they're not perfect, they'll be fine, and a blown save is not exactly a habit of Kazuhiro Sasaki's if you'll kindly note his record of 17 saves, and really, as mad as this game today made me, LOOK AT WHAT JAMIE AND ARTIE DID! EIGHT SHUTOUT INNINGS AGAINST THE THREE-PEAT DEFENDING WORLD CHAMPIONS! New York got LUCKY today! That is ALL! I'd hardly say our pitching is in crisis. Honestly, I am sick to death of people just waiting to proclaim the 2001 Mariners a fluke. News flash America! We are GOOD, we are SOLID, we are WORTHY. Deal with it. And now, if you'll excuse me, I should probably go be sedated before I pop a blood vessel.